Matthew

Over 50% of marriages end in divorce.  This doesn't even take into account that marriage rates continue to fall since people are just living together.  On the surface the statistics are the same among those who call themselves Christians.  When you dig into those statistics you find that divorce rates are vastly different for those Christians who are active and serving in their church. 

Marriage is a hotbutton issue in our culture and its debated endlessly.  From a biblical perspective though, those that are married and should stay that way, aren't doing so.  Those that should get married won't; instead they live together.  Those that shouldn't be married can now legally get married and they want it done in the church.

Matthew 19:1-2

While Matthew, along with Luke and Mark, focused on Jesus' Galilean ministry, there's no reason to think this is the first trip to Judea.  They obviously treat the trip to Judea just prior to crucifixion as more significant.  But Jesus had ministered in Judea previously.

This trip to Judea was down along the Jordan.  All along the way, great multitudes followed Jesus.  They came to be healed, to be fed, to hear truth and be instructed.  Some probably followed out of curiosity while others came as a disciple.  There was probably an ebb and flow to the crowd.  Some probably fell away and went home; new folks heard of Jesus and came to see who He was.  No matter who came, Jesus healed them. 

We can see there were no geographical limits for the ministry of Jesus. 

Matthew 19:3

The attacks and tests by the Pharisees become more focused and pronounced.  They intend to put Jesus out of business so the Jews could get back to the law.  They seem to test him at every opportunity, seeking charges, seeking to harm.  With each test, as the cross draws closer, they become more intense. 

When the Pharisees ask about divorce, they weren't trying to figure this out.  They wanted to trap Jesus; to put destroy his popularity.  One commentator suggest they may have been drawing Jesus into a discussion regarding Herod - Herodias in hopes of Jesus getting the same treatment as John the Baptist. 

The Jews held marriage in high regard.  It was a man's duty to get married and have a family.  To not get married was even viewed as breaking God's commandment to be fruitful and multiply.  To not marry and have a family was seen as if you killed all those who could have been your offspring.  Yet, as high as they marriage, they held a low view of women.  The ladies were viewed as property with no rights.  They were necessary, but not respected as a person.  From this attitude, the high view of marriage was flawed or harmed. 

There were two teachings in that day.  Both were based on Deuteronomy 24:1. 

"When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, ² when she has departed from his house, and goes and becomes another man's wife, ³ if the latter husband detests her and writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her as his wife, ⁴ then her former husband who divorced her must not take her back to be his wife after she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the Lord, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance.

This word 'uncleanness' actually means 'a form of nakedness'.  The very conservative approach took this uncleanness as sexual immorality and taught that divorce was allowed only in this case.  The liberal approach to this 'uncleanness' was when a woman brought on any disappointment to a man, in any way.  If she burned supper, the husband could give her a certificate of divorce.  If he grew tired of her; didn't like it that she got grumpy; or just found someone he considered more beautiful and desirable, then he could write her a certificate of divorce.

In a society dominated by men and where women were not only not fully appreciated but downright disrespected, we can guess which teaching was more popular.  So, the Pharisees tested Jesus.  If He said he believed the liberal approach was correct then they could accuse Him of not respecting the law.  If he said the conservative approach was correct, then the multitude would turn against Him.  This is the trap they laid and the corner they attempted to put Jesus in.

Matthew 19:4-6

Jesus went back to the first marriage (Genesis 1:27; 2:24).  God made them male and female.  Eve was made for Adam from Adam; she was bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh, literally!  There was no denying that God made them to be together.  There was never a day that Adam said, "Eve, I think this was a mistake, I think I'm going to find someone else."  There was no sin, no shame, no sinful lust or wandering eye.  What God joined together could not be torn apart.

The Pharisees wanted a debate about traditions and teachings and viewpoints, Jesus wanted to go right to God's word.  This is God's design of marriage.  There is no discussion of divorce.  There is no back door; no 'give it a try and see what happens' mentality about this.  This isn't a means for playing house or a way for kids to act like adults until someone they think is better comes along.  This is a physical union - 'one flesh' means 'as if they were of the same physical body'.  Imagine what it would be like if you were physically joined together by God when you were married.  When she felt physical pain, you felt it.  When she was depressed, you were depressed.  When she was grumpy, you were grumpy.   When you broke her heart, your own heart was broken.  Imagine sharing every emotion.  Of course the other side of this is sharing every intimacy, every joy, every smile, every tender moment.  This is what it should be like.

If divorce were not possible, a lot more thought would go into getting married; there would be a lot more time and consideration.  One would make sure they ended up with the one whom God had made for them.

A man wouldn't hit his wife if she were his flesh and he felt the pain.  We would all be more loving and understanding of our spouse if there were a direct link to your health and joy.  What God has joined together, no man can separate.  So, if a couple is truly joined by God, which is what most ceremonies at least used to desire to emulate, then man can't separate them.  If man separates them, then they were never truly joined by God. 

The words 'joined together' actually mean yoked.  It was the same word used to describe two oxen joined by a yoke and harnesses.  They are equal, yoked together in a work.  Sometimes one is tired and the other is doing the work; sometimes its the other way around.  But never, is the yoke broken, but by death.

Matthew 19:7

Jesus seemed to avoid answering them, or at least answering them the way they wanted.  But the question was flawed because of a wrong understanding of marriage.  It shows in their response.  Moses didn't 'command' divorce. 

Matthew 19:8-9

Jesus clarifies God's view of marriage.  Divorce was a concession.  It was permitted because of sin, but it wasn't intended to be that way.  Divorce is never to be viewed as a neutral option; as if it could be the better solution than marriage.  It can only seem this way because of sin and hardheartedness. 

Jesus makes it clear that God views the 'uncleanness' of Deuteronomy as Sexual immorality.  When God joins a husband and wife, and they divorce, God says they are still joined as one flesh.  When they marry to another, they are committing adultery.  This adultery is a form of the sexual immorality that is the only legitimate reason for divorce.  Both parties become guilty of this sin in God's eyes. 

We must be cautious with this.  It's a sin and it is serious.  But, this isn't presented to heap condemnation on anyone who was divorced and remarried.  This sin, like any other, is a matter to be dealt with at the throne of grace.  If repentance and forgiveness is needed, seek after it, receive it and get on with life.  I find this irritating when someone wants to keep track of who was divorced and remarried.  Jesus said, "You have heard that it was said to those of old, 'You shall not commit adultery.' ²⁸ But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart."  If we all bore our sin openly for all to see, it would be an ugly thing. 

Matthew 19:10-12

Jesus acknowledges that it is okay not to marry but that a life of celibacy is okay.  This was looked down on in the Jewish culture of that day.  They saw it as a sin if you didn't marry and have kids; it was a denial to be fruitful and multiply in their eyes.  God the son said this is not a sin but a life given to some.  The religious leaders of that day wouldn't agree but Jesus is also agreeing with God's word and ways (Isaiah 56:3).

The term 'eunuchs' was a Greek term meaning "guardian of the bed".  This is a reference to a castrated individual who supervised a royal harem.  It was used also in general terms for a man that was incapable of reproduction.  Jesus puts eunuchs in three groups:

1. Men who were born that way.
2. Men who had been made eunuchs through castration.  This was the guardian of the harem.
3. Men who made themselves Eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake.  This is seen as a life of celibacy to focus all of one's energy and time to ministry and study.  Yet, some have taken this literally and submitted themselves to castration for the kingdom of God.  It is possible Origen was an example of this.

Matthew 19:13-15

Its not hard to imagine what this moment looked like.  A multitude was there having followed Jesus, the Pharisees confronted Him with this test regarding marriage.  It was a serious teaching when someone brings a group of kids in.  In the moment this may have seemed disruptive.  The disciples tried to shoo this kids away as a disruptive interference.  But Jesus stops them, letting the children come.  It's like Jesus said this is the way it should work.  It was normal that children were brought to the teacher that he might pray and pronounce a blessing on them.  Jesus lad His hands on them and blessed them.

The picture of these little kids coming to Jesus seems like a fitting end to the His lesson to the Pharisees, the disciples and the multitude regarding marriage.

Matthew 19:16

Mark and Luke also wrote of this man.  When we put the three gospel accounts together we know this was a rich, young ruler.  This man just wants to cut to the chase; what 'thing' did he need to do to go to heaven. 

This is the inclination of all men.  Give me a list of things to do to earn my way.  Then I can decide if I think its worth my time, I can establish the pace and the priority of what I'll do.  It's as if he said, "Just give me the directions and I'll do it myself."

There's a rich, young ruler in all of us. But this isn't a Yellow Brick Road on a trip to Oz. 

Matthew 19:17

Did this man comprehend 'good'?  Did he understand that no one is good but God?  Obviously not; he saw himself as good and worthy of heaven.  He just wanted to know where the finish line was so he could step across. 

One must recognize their own inability to earn their way to heaven before they can come to Christ.  They must see their own wretchedness; someone once said, until you are downwind of your self you don't really understand your own sinful odor.  In telling this man to go keep the commandments, Jesus was putting this man before the law of God.  He was exposing Him to God's holy standard. 

Romans 3:19-20

¹⁹ Now we know that whatever the law says, it says to those who are under the law, that every mouth may be stopped, and all the world may become guilty before God. ²⁰ Therefore by the deeds of the law no flesh will be justified in His sight, for by the law is the knowledge of sin.

James 1:22-25

²² But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. ²³ For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; ²⁴ for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was. ²⁵ But he who looks into the perfect law of liberty and continues in it, and is not a forgetful hearer but a doer of the work, this one will be blessed in what he does.

This man didn't understand his own question about going to heaven.  He didn't acknowledge any sin.  He was self righteous, already fit for heaven in his own eyes.  In standing before the mirror of the law, his sight would be corrected.  He would see his own wretchedness, then he would be ready to come to Jesus.

There have been many 'rich, young rulers' who came to Jesus for a ticket to heaven.  They recited some words as if it were a magic incantation.  They were told they would now go to heaven.  There was never an acknowledgment of wretchedness, there was no repentance, no heart change, no life change and no abiding in Christ from that day.  My fear is that many have deceived themselves and some day they will hear, "I never knew you."

Matthew 19:18-20

Jesus only gave him the commandments regarding his interaction with other men.  It may well be that he kept these commandments as he had been taught, but not because his heart was pure.  He could not stand up under the "but I say to you......" of the Sermon on the Mount when Jesus corrected their understanding. 

Matthew 19:21-22

In the gospel of Mark, it says that Jesus looked at him and loved him.  Jesus was leading him to the truth that he didn't want to hear.  What did the man lack?  He had to forsake all and follow Jesus.  That was it.  This mans heart wasn't with God, it was with money.  To forsake his authority as a ruler, to give away all his money, that was insanity as far as he was concerned.  This man went away sorrowful because he couldn't let go of these things.  It was his life, his security. 

All the money and power in the world will not make a person happy.  There is no fulfillment, no security and no comfort for the soul.  Money and power does nothing to ease the conscious that is guilty of sin.  This is played out daily in Hollywood tabloids as the lives of the rich and powerful play out this lesson.  They are never content; always looking for some fulfillment; always searching for something to fill that blackness within them.  Some day the looks will wrinkle, the respect gone, money dried up, no one will care what they think.  This life will deliver a rich, young ruler to death as an old, poor and lonely sinner exposed to the wrath of God for all eternity.

The call for this young man to lay down his riches is for this young man.  It might be for you also.  But it's not a commandment for everyone.  You may need to lay down your pride or your authority.  This forsaking of all is applied to whatever it is in your life you allow to lord over you or you use to lord over your life.  It must be laid down.

Matthew 19:23-26

A camel through an eye of a needle; that's impossible!!  It seems impossible for this rich man, because he has to forsake that for which he was identified.  He would have to become the formerly rich ruler. 

None of us can save our self through our actions.  We can only be saved by Jesus Christ.  With us, it is impossible. 

Matthew 19:27

Peter poses a blatant question that reveals there's a little rich young ruler in him.  If he had forsaken all, why is it important what he shall have?

Matthew 19:28-30

Jesus tells the disciples that their forsaking all to follow Him is actually an investment in eternal things.  When Jesus is on the throne, we will be in His presence and receive amazing blessings in eternal life. 

While Peter spoke up, this promise may feed the sinful rich young ruler in any of us.  I believe that's why verse 30 is joined to this answer.  The first will be last and the last first.  We are to be submitted to serving Jesus at whatever He's called us to; not for rewards or eternal riches, but out of obedience and love.  We can't forsake all as a rich young ruler as if it were an investment plan that takes some time to pay off; that would mean we are still seeking those riches and power, we're just patient and willing to wait for it. 

It always comes back to the heart.  Jesus wants a heart that's broken and contrite over sin; a heart He can change into a heart of a servant; a heart that can learn to love Him more every day; a heart that can love others and serve them to reflect Jesus to other rich young rulers.

Amen

©2015 Doug Ford